Am I an energy vampire unknowingly?

[Madelyn]

Hey everyone, I’m needing some advice on my energy, especially the way that it affects others.

One of my roommates and I sat down the other day for a chat and they confessed to me that they have felt uncomfortable around me for months. This was a shock, I had sensed something was off in the house sometimes but wasn’t attributing it to myself.

I asked them if If there was any feedback they wanted to give me or if there was anything I had done. They said they couldn’t verbalize it, there was no feedback to be given just that around me they get this uncomfortable feeling in their body.

I’m a highly emotional person always have been, this past year I started doing shadow work, meditating, and working on protecting myself and have honestly felt better. It seems though the better I feel the more I might disrupt my roommate’s energy.

Any suggestions on what could be going on? I don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable, but I also have no way of going about improving it

Discussion

[Melonby77]

I found that as I became more enlightened from self work and improved my vibration, some friends became uncomfortable because suddenly we were on different wavelengths. I didn’t want to gossip or put others down or complain about this or that and those changes meant those friends moved on and that’s ok. Because I got new friends 🙂

[MisterMoogle03]

The irony. From what you describe it sounds like they are reacting to the work you’re doing.

If it bothers them that intensely, either they’re also extremely emotionally sensitive or is the vampire and now unable to access your energy/latching on to the shadow work energy you’ve been releasing.

Sometimes our own healing can trigger healing in others by proximity but they may not feel comfortable or ready to deal with the feelings on their end.

Keep on doing you, it’s on the roomie to deal with their feelings as long as you aren’t disrespecting them/their space in any way.

[Kindly_Transition_42]

I recently was listening to the Enlightened Empathy podcast w Michelle Belanger, who describes herself as an energetic vampire and what she had to say was very interesting. She did talk about some indictors people get that are vampiric, but also some of the advantages. I think it’s the most recent episode.
But, i could see multiple possibilities of what is going on. One, your room mate could be an energy vampire and now that you’ve been doing all the protecting work they feel uncomfortable w the dynamic shift? Some people in our lives, vampire or not, don’t like to see us do better. Whether that is because they don’t have the control over us they used to or because misery loves company. You’re on a journey you were led to be on and are focusing on improving yourself, you can’t come off that path for someone else’s feelings- considering such would make me lean more towards them being the issue.
Apart from that, how has the shadow work left you feeling? Are you feeling better all around? If so, the people that love you will notice and encourage your efforts. Or are you doing too much too fast and maybe carrying heavy thoughts around? That could be effecting the atmosphere, especially if they’re sensitive.

[FremdShaman23]

I don’t know of this applies to you or not, but let me describe someone to you who definitely is an unknowing energy vampire — my mom. I’ll describe her, the feeling around her, and the phenomena and then you can see if any of this relates to you or not. If it does–then you’ll be working from a place of knowledge and can work on it. If it doesn’t, then maybe you can feel some relief. There is no judgement here. I love my mom, but she has some issues. I also want to say– she is NOT a bad person. Trigger warnings now: abuse, suicidal ideation. sorry, this will be long.

First off–my mom is mentally ill. She says it’s “clinical depression” and she has elements of that, but she’s most likely undiagnosed BPD. I don’t think she’s ever been truly honest with a therapist about her own behaviors. She’s always the victim in her stories–and sometimes she has been victimized. Her own childhood had a lot of emotional neglect, and I know there was some childhood sexual abuse from a neighbor. She does NOT handle stress well. She’s a loving person, but she was also a very difficult mom. Emotional neglect, verbal abuse, emotional abuse. It wasn’t easy being her kid. Lots of gaslighting, guilt tripping. Ugh. Anyway I survived. She survived. Our relationship has survived but I have to make clear boundaries with her. If she has a bad feeling or a negative thought or emotion she does not do any sort of self reflection or internal work to improve herself, or think about how her actions have affected others. Instead she just goes over and over the bad feelings, making them worse. When confronted about her own bad behavior she will apologize, but then throw out endless reasons about how she’s the real victim, or talk about all the bad things that happened to her and how that justifies her actions. Her pain is always #1. Anyone else’s comes last. She’s attempted to kill herself several times over the years. Now she’s terminally ill, and honestly? I think unconsciously she likes that fact. She spent all this time wishing to die and doing BS attempts to die for largely attention seeking reasons and now here she is. She gets to die with all the attention and not by her own hand, so no guilt. Even so, she genuinely loves, and despite these behaviors is a good person. As she’s aged she has mellowed and has longer good periods than bad periods. She is an excellent grandparent.

ANYWAY. A few years ago we hit rough times and me and my hubs and kids had to move in with her. We knew what we were in for with her regarding all I described above–but we were not prepared for the energy vampirism.

Her house–always has a bad vibe. The only way I can describe it, is when you walk in you feel like you are being eaten, energetically speaking. it’s just awful. the air is THICK. Living there was very difficult. My mom was kind and relatively in good spirits and on her best behavior. But I saged, burned salt, etc. It never helped. My kids would be fine one moment, then they would be suddenly overtaken with overwhelming sadness. My kid would say “I was fine a second ago. Why am I crying?” Another child suddenly developed night terrors. Meditating in that house was impossible. My husband and child started getting the sleep paralysis/Old Hag syndrome. I was lying in bed at night and felt someone touch me. Oh also–she was an antique dealer so there were objects filled with bad vibes all over the house. Things improved for my family and we moved out, but things were still bad at my mom’s. I went to feed her cats when she was out of town once and I could barely make it through the door–it’s like a huge whomp! of bad energy greeted me as soon as I stepped inside. Spirits? Maybe. Most likely there were spirits but I had the major impression that my mother had unconsciously created a–I dunno, energy being that fed for her. And when she left, it was still there–looking to feed. I think that’s what “fed” on us at night, caused my kids emotional fits, etc. I had two healers from a spiritual church over and they tried to clear the house of its bad energy with me. Didn’t work. I think my mom causes it, and it attracts other “beings” which are on the negative side. She can’t deal with any problem without putting it on someone else emotionally, and energetically she does the very same thing.

She sold all her antiques and moved –and her new place has the same issues. I don’t think it’s spirits that followed her–it’s her. You talk to her and she goes on for an hour about her health issues and you just feel drained. Her house feels icky inside. You can’t take a clear breath. It just feels suffocating all the time. It’s like she doesn’t have enough energy and love for herself, so she unconsciously sucks it from everyone around her. I think this is something that occurs when a person is not emotionally mature, and also perhaps a bit psychokinetic. My mom’s self-perception is always set at “me me me, more more, poor me, help me, love me, give to me, I need, I need, pay attention to me”, combine that with some psychokinetic ability that she is not aware of/does not consciously control and you have a “feeder” type energy attached to her (that can sometimes move independently of her) that does all the vampirism for her. If she were to truly get emotionally mature/psychologically healthy I think this would resolve. But she’s not really able to do that–she doesn’t seem to really be able to address her flaws and that’s what it would take.

[Warrior_of_Peace]

If you’re shifting to healthier states, you could likely be subconsciously triggering their unhealed traumas.

[PassionRound]

my suggestion is do not spend anymore energy worrying about your effect on others. (as long as you’re being kind) everyone is responsible for their own feelings, and if you trigger people, it’s on them to deal with it. just continue your journey of healing, and make sure you’re finding more and more happiness 🙂 and don’t spend anymore energy thinking about the concept “energy vampire”. it carries such negative, judgmental connotations. i cannot stand that term. there is so much shame attached to this. there is nothing wrong with you. continue on your path to inner peace and happiness. 💖

[AbyssDomme]

You may be a projective empath. Although without having feedback from another psychic, empath, or energy worker, it would be difficult to say. Although it doesn’t sound like vampirism to me.

[hubsmash]

It is my opinion that you are taking far too much responsibility for this situation. I will not presume anything about the roommate, but I will explain what I believe is happening.

Healing shadow aspects of self and accepting yourself with love will bring about a change in consciousness. This is most easily described as a frequency or vibratory rate, which increases with the reduction of distortion in the energy centers. This reduction occurs when forgiveness is applied to the illusory distortions and aspects of the self are again embraced.

Others will react to these changes in an infinitely varied way. Some will notice a new shine to you, and may compliment you or feel impressed, and may be excited for this shift they perceive. Others will go the complete opposite way, and your presence will disturb their peace.

The one who is agitated is always agitated because they are not accepting their own energy. To speak more plainly, they feel a presence in you that they believe they cannot match. This intimidates them as they subconsciously compare themselves to you, and then the ego runs off to figure out who the enemy is and what they did wrong to make them feel agitated.

In other words, you can’t do anything about it, it is not your responsibility, and energy vampirism is misunderstood. All humans choose where they put their energy. It is never taken. It is only given and received in free will. The term energy vampire is used to describe people that make us feel drained because we don’t accept them, often because they don’t accept us or our truth. They do not force away our energy. We are tricked and give it away with our free will.

Acceptance. Forgiveness.

I do not recommend you mention any of this to your roommate. It will be received as judgemental. Accept their agitation. Forgive yourself for your participation. Forgive them for their participation. Let it go. It is not your issue, and you need not worry yourself with improving another’s emotional state. It is good to be sympathetic and compassionate, but detach from the responsibility. It sucks they feel bad. It doesn’t mean it is your fault or issue to fix.

[cummythot]

You’re not an energetic vampire. You are not stealing there energy. If they are unable to verbalise their issues, then you should not feel too guilty. The fact that you do feel guilty is even more evidence that its not your fault. Sometimes people dont click, and feel weird around each other, but it really isnt the end of the world.

[AnnaBear6]

My husband has an incredibly threatening/uncomfortable aura and unless you knew him, most people feel extremely uncomfortable around him. Some people just seem to have auras like that. I seem to have an aura that makes people think I will be nice to anyone and take advantage of me 🤷‍♀️ keep working on identifying your inner self and things that may make you have this aura. I don’t know you personally so I couldn’t tell you for sure if you’re an energy sapper. It may just be the way you come across. Also is there any bad blood between you and room mate or anyone they know? Any weird rejection/sexual tension? That could also explain it. I’m a female and I had a male room mate who had feelings for me that I had no idea about for the longest time until he came up to me sincerely one day and told me that he cannot continue to be around me because I’m married and he knows I’m unavailable and cannot stand it. He left. Consider all things and angles.

[CelticsPrincess1991]

nope, you’re not an energy vampire at all. your friend is the one who’s the energy vampire and because you’ve made a positive change in your life, he or she doesn’t like it because he or she can’t feed off you anymore. you keep doing you.

[ApprenticeOfSilence]

maybe they benefited from when you were feeling worse?

I don’t get the energy vampire vibe from you, far from actually. I get the vision of almost like a shield around you and that makes it very comfortable to talk to you because you’re conscious about not drowning others in your energy. I feel like you have the ability to be straightforward and not manipulate!

The uncomfortable feeling your roommate is feeling is probably a trigger. They can’t explain the energy shift, but they feel it. **I am sorry you are going through this.**
I’d recommend you too look at your pattern that might be a match to this behaviour ( having people blame you for the times when they feel shitty) and see if you can talk to the part of you that’s self blaming (and therefor mirrors the energy of others blaming you because that’s what you do on the inside)

I had a friend, at it hurt so bad to lose that friendship, BUT every time I’d feel bad she would feel good. After a while I said fuck it I will show you that I feel good, I will work on myself… and she disappeared out of my life (making me feel as if I was making her uncomfortable and that there was something off about **me**)

hope something of what I wrote helps you,
much love!

[teatimewithbatman1]

Naa sounds like your vibe is starting to raise thier darkness to the surface.

Darkness cannot exist within the presence of light

[nic0l-3]

Maybe meditate on sending them loving compassion daily? I often affect my husband without realizing it, as I can get quite anxious, and it’s something I’ve been trying. Visualization is a wonderful tool. I’ve also been talking to him about how he can protect his own energy. Imagining himself as a white pillar of light, and telling himself he is protected. I would meditate on this topic and ask myself, “What can I do to mend this?”

[astraea-d]

I would suggest trying to do some spiritual work on your side to ensure that your energies stay in your own lane, so to speak. I think you could do this on different levels depending on your beliefs. If you successfully do that and she is still having issues, it is something on her side.