I’m being called and don’t know how to answer

[Nicolina]

First, bear with me and my typos as I’m not a native English speaker, thank you ????

So, I will try my best to explain it in English.
Since I was a child I experienced a wide spectrum of things, like seeing a couple of farmers walking in the country in the middle of a city avenue, hearing angels singing or music, sensing de-encarnated souls (Almas desencarnadas) like seeing shadows, hearing them call me, thing like that. I only can see and talk with the deceased I knew (my dog, my grandma, my uncle). Also I always knew I have guardian angels and could feel in my bed until I was 13/14 yo. Oh, and I knew when my grandma was going to die, she had cancer but I just knew, it’s rare I’m writing this on the anniversary of her death but she’s really funny and found it hilarious.

When I was like 18/19 I went to a akashic records opening (is that the word? In Spanish is lectura o apertura) and I was told I was born gifted and when I became stronger enought I would talk and communicate with de-encarnated souls. Also that I would reach my peek the day I became a mother (I don’t know why but I’m interested to discover that). So after this, the person who did the reading taught it to me and I must say it felt really natural and easy. I start to meditate, clean my bodies, I learn how to do a profound cleaning with the pendulum and generate shields of energy to protect myself (I know how to clean houses but I don’t do it because part of it it’s helping souls to cross over and it’s usually really crowded, it’s like they know I’m coming and it drains my energy) .

It always flow so naturally, I just know I have to learn something or my masters will let me know. But the breaking point was new year’s eve, I don’t know what happen but I’m feeling really odd since the first of January, I then got sick and altought I’m on a second week of antibiotics I still feel kind of sick like I sweat and sleep a lot and feel a lot of things like a snowball of moods that becomes bigger and bigger. It’s so hard to explain what I feel, but it’s close to an existential crisis. I feel this is the time, this is when I fully develope and I have to choose if I carry on with my career or I make my gift my career or this would blend in an odd but pleasent way.

So, my question will be, any advice? How you achieve to fully develope your gift? Do you have to choose between your career and your gift? Do you want to tell me your experience or give me a word of wisdom? Your answers are welcome in my heart, even if it’s just comfort.

I know that when the time comes I will know what I need to know but it really makes me feel better and it gives me comfort to hear your stories, also I must add that mediumship runs in my mother side of the family but apparently I’m the first one who has reach this point, so I’m kind of lost.

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