What to do now

[Madelyn]

Hi for context, I’m F19 and empathic. I’ve always had issues making friends as I was shy, so my closest friends always ended up being extroverts who adopted me lmao. Anyways, years later I noticed how one sided the effort and care was with a lot of relationships and cut everything that drained me. I had a very empty and dark time that nobody helped with, so I had to do what I had to do, because being disappointed by your closest people kept me down fr. I can’t escape my family for now so I’m still inhibited lol but not to the same extent I was with toxic friends. I even sensed evil eye being thrown at me from them for years and I wonder if that’s why my high school years were so gloomy. I used their problems as a distraction from my own in a way, and overextended myself and they got too used to it.

Regardless, I feel super empty now and can’t find people with similar vibrations at all. Even with those old vibes I felt better than just empty rooms, it’s even more draining somehow. I’ve dealt with most of my suppressed trauma and keep my intentions light and good. I’ve been a loner but focused for months on improving my own vibration to attract more like it, however it hasn’t rlly improved. All that happens is I socialize and see through ppl too easily to even gain interest to pursue a friendship. After suffering thru sm to believe in people I get repelled with even the tiniest hindrance. I can be funny and charming, but i never see a real reason truly to open up. I know when they just want something out of me and superficiality is boring, idk where to find like minded people with good energies or maybe if there is something wrong with what I’m doing.

My psychic visions have improved a bit, and stay more reliable when I do regular readings with tarot, but have only warned me/shown me negative future events with people rather than anything good. It’s like emergency signals get thru only, and they’re triggered sm because of the people around me being so sketchy. The only guidance I ever get is to move out, but I can’t even imagine living alone. I’m an introvert and yet I need socializIng too, just deeper and more insightful conversations which makes it even harder to fulfill. I’m great at caring for other but I’m very aloof snd cold, but over analyzing myself doesn’t work. know awakenings are lonely and scary, but I feel like I’ve set a new standard of thoughts without a physical base for them, like they don’t match or connect at all

Discussion

[cummythot]

my suggestion would be to work on your personal world in a way thats detached from your psychic abilities!

We all need space that is grounded, safe, supportive and fun and it seems like you’re missing that. Enhanced connection to the energetic world is useful for your wellbeing, but for this instance your physical world needs modifying. Emancipation, interests, and human connection is important for you right now. You need to follow the paths that lead you to better areas in these regards. The spirituality is going nowhere, its always within you 🙂

[tracydot3]

It seems like you’re focusing too much on having other people give you a certain feeling or energy and aren’t working enough on generating that within yourself. The only way to attract people with higher vibrations is to generate high vibrations. But you seem really judgmental of others and not really self-reflective.

Empathetic people put themselves in others shoes. You have not said anything here that shows any empathy for others, all I read is judgment and you blaming others for your problems. Look into why you are doing that and address the true source of your pain.

You need some “hermit” time where you are alone and sit with yourself and deal with parts of yourself that make you upset or uncomfortable. If you are only getting negative visions and readings, it’s because there’s a lot of negativity in you that needs to be cleared out. No one else is going to clear that out for you. I recommend daily meditation.

As for your psychic abilities, it looks like you are seeing the bad in others and situations, using divination to reinforce that negative vision and then thinking you’re right all the time when you create that scenario. It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy. If you say everyone around you is negative, everyone is shallow, etc, that is all you will see and attract. I would stop trying to tell the future and work on the present. The tarot is supposed to reveal things about yourself to help you become a better person but it seems the way you are reading tarot is not allowing you to see the true language of the cards since you are limiting the language with your own negativity.

You need some serious introspection because you are the one generating negativity. Not saying everyone around you is perfect, no one is perfect, but you are 100% in charge of how you react to things and what choices you make no matter what anyone else does. Stop blaming others, stop expecting others to give you something. The energy you project is the energy you attract. Learn to love yourself and truly see yourself so that you can love and see others as they are, not as you want them to be in a clouded state of mind.